Years ago I had a dream that had always had me stump as to the meaning of it. It takes place in the old west and the dream started at the end of an Indian attack on a wagon. A young women was standing by an overturned wagon with an infant in her arm when an lone Indian came charging toward her on a horse and snatch the infant from out of her arm by it's head, it was as if I was seeing it and feeling it from the eyes of the women, the infant and the Indian all at the same time. It was so upsetting, it was so real that  I woke up shaking.

From~"Portraits Of An American Family And The Illusion Of It All."

I am promoting what I love and what I love is the teaching of ACIM. Instead of bashing what I hate I want to write about what I know, I want my book "Portraits Of An American Family And The Illusions Of It All." to be a teching tool. I am scouting  around for an editor to help me with the second draft. I love to write and I want my book to be at it best before I start on the second draft before sending it in to a publisher.

Me in my younger days when I really didn't understand anything and like ACIM manual tells us we really don't understand anything I really didn't and I still don't and I guess that's a good thing. so maybe  I'm ahead of the game and not behind and I shouldn't fel guilty about that and I don't any more.

All of my adult life of being told what to do, how to do it, when to do it,  how to feel and all the lies that I was told just to keep me in fear I walked a way from the LDS Church and never looked back as I realize that I didn't need it, want it, or missed it and I am much happier without it and I am sure that when this book is publish that they will excommunicate me just to keep the fear going but what they don't understand is that I excommicated them first. But I still wanted to find the truth, not the truth that someone was telling me to get control or to put fear into me, but the real truth. I've had so msny crappie people in my life that  had hurt me, discourge me, let me down and stomped on me that I wanted to know why and to have peace and forgiveness in my heart.

From~ "Portraits Of An American Family And The Illusions Of It All."

I do have another way of looking at my life I do have another choice. I am a student of ACIM I've been studying for a couple of years now.  Writing my book is not just for myself or to  linger on the past it's to let go of the past.I've let go of the hurt and the pain a long time ago the only pain that I have now is the pain that those people that I love don't have the love of knowing of who they really are. I want my book to be a teaching tool for others. As I teach I learn.

It's really difficult to write a book about my family, The Heckert  Family when they didn't know how to love when all your really wanted from them was love.

Everything else will become useless and fade away from our grasp as we realize that it doesn't really exist at all and it's all in a dream and we are the dreaming it. and we are the dreamers of this world and our real self is still with god safe from harm.


From~ Portraits Of An American Family And The Illusion Of It all.